Knock You Down

Keri Hilson drops the video for 'Knock You Down' to coincide with the album release. Watchin Kanye and Ne-Yo fighting over Keri is like...it might be the funniest thing ever. The tension should have come to blows and then I could have given the whole thing 4 stars. But because that's missing I give it a 'meh'. As a fan of fuckery Kanye's appearance in anything is welcome from me but aside from that and Ne-Yo's face, not a whole lot going on. I did peep her MJ move at Ye's line but she didn't even act out Joe Jackson's part. Now be fair, Keri!

In A Perfect World

After producing hits for an endless list of pop and R&B artists, songwriter and Clutch production team graduate, Keri Hilson's album In A Perfect World will be in stores soon. I've been trying to give myself a little bit of time to let it sink in instead of making a snap judgment because a snap judgment on this from me may not have given her her due. Keri is a talented singer and writer but her voice falls into a range where it isn't immediately interesting like some other popular R&B singers out at the moment. It isn't soulful and pleading like Jazmine Sullivan's, or taunting and bizzare like Rihanna's...I could go on but the reality is that on first listen her voice is almost boring and it tends to get lost in her precision beats. Like it's an album full of great songs that sound like they were recorded for other artists to select and re-record. However, you simply can't deny the production of the music and thankfully she has guests to fill out the roster so I find myself nodding along. So it's okay Keri, I forgive you.

The Breakdown

Intro - She reps her state, city, click The Clutch, and body. It's the same kinda shit talkin, slick talkin that got her in trouble with Beyonce and Ciara, allegedly. But it sounds nice.

Turnin Me On - The single that I hear 8 times a day at work. I'm sick of it but I guess that's just an indicator of success. Lil Wayne babbles at the end of it also but i'm not surprised to hear him anywhere. I become alarmed when I don't hear Weezy on a track, I wonder what happened and whether he's sick.

Set Your Money Up - It's nice to hear Keyshia Cole talkin slick on a fast track and Trina's on it too but this pretty much sounds like a gold diggers anthem. "We don't like them broke boys, we don't like them broke boys!"

Return the Favor - The melody reminds me of Timbaland and Keri's 'The Way I Are"...Timbo's also on the track and the two of them talkin about sexin each other is not my favorite thing at all.

Knock You Down - Great pop song. Yeezy and Ne-Yo really fill out the track and it sounds good and feels good. Kanye's back doing what made him a star...talkin bout Michael Jackson's crazy ass.

Slow Dance - Sexy, synth track. It sounds like something I would absolutely love to hear Tweet sing on but Keri does it justice.

Make Love - Whenever I hear this vocal arrangement I think 4 NonBlondes 'What's Up" But barring that (or because of it), I think it's a decent song. She manages to do this thing with her voice that gives it a raspy quality. It's still clean but this is one of the better vocalizations on the album. Kanye was obviously in the video to upset everyone.

Intuition - This track is about assuming your man ain't shit from before you get in the relationship. Even though I don't condone that way of thinking it's pretty relate-able and listenable. It uses eastern instruments and sounds like the things Timbo and Missy used to do three or four albums back but warmed over. Remember them days? Good times.

How Does it Feel? - Come to find out she was right about dude and this song is about tellin him she can leave. It's also a hit, but kind of repetitive. Production is nothing new but its executed well, steady drums, triumphant horns, Polow tha Don, etc.

Alienated - Awesome song. It has a delicate strange, futuristic, quality which is spot on for a song about feeling alone and alienated. Feels like cruising through bizzare, lifeless landscapes in a spaceship. So when you hear 'You're the reason I don't change my number/ want you to know it's still the same.." you feel the longing. There's pleading, reaching, feeling. This is one of the best on the album.

Tell Him The Truth - Slow somber song about having to confess a secret but not wanting to. The beat is simple, synth guitar over slow rhythmic drum beats and clicks with a repetitious hook. But, she recognizes the negative space is an opportunity to stretch the vocal chords and she does.

Change Me - That song that sounds like that other song and it has Akon on it like every other song on the radio. It's not bad but it's just not interesting and listening to Akon doing his best Seal impression and sounding like Wyclef is just not something I would prefer to subject myself to.

Energy - Another dope song. You've heard the single. And seen the sexy ass video (I gotta get cut like that one day).

Where Did He Go? - Warm synths and vocal layering that makes a pretty song about getting over a break up.

Keri does a damn good job with this album. It's not good enough to warrant her making diss tracks about anybody really but I suppose she eventually remembered that and corrected herself. I don't see her becoming a close to my heart favorite of mine like the Wino but this is a solid album with, as expected, excellent production. Even the throwaways could be singles for more popular artists and we'd have to listen to them at the club and on the way too and from everywhere on earth unless we turn off the car radio. Anyways, you should go check it out.

Love and Sex and Magic

Ciara feat. Justin Timberlake - Love Sex Magic

So this highly anticipated Ciara and JT video has dropped. I don't know if the star power is what created the anticipation but from the looks of this silly ass 60 second trailer I knew that fuckery was in store. I never really found Justin Timberlake to be able to convey sexy that well but if he can have half a chance at faking it, it's at the hands of a sexpot energy from his co star. Ciara is pullin out the stops but she ends up lookin like the stripper with no ass at the club, workin her little heart out for your dollars. Please Mister, have a heart. All the ropes and heels and fishnets are just not bringing the sexy. But I do give Ciara a gold star for trying, and for looking damn good while trying. But let's face it Promise was the sexiest video that I've seen from her and she was in sweatpants. Stop forcing it people! Let it move through you...niiiice and sloooww..mmm, thats it...
Anyway back to the song itself. The video does help me stomach the song a bit because it basically sounds like a track that J Lo would have stole from Christina Milian back in the day and then decide not to use anyway. But in all I don't know how I feel about this direction. I hate it when artists twist themselves into bizzare situations, I'm all for evolution but it ought to be a natural evolution. Ciara is sexier doing the stanky-leg with Snoop Dogg than she is in bondage gear and selling ass in heels. But it's a recession so I can feel her, just not the music.

I Like Sex and I'm Good At It

The irascible John Mayer and his foray into hip-hop.
Source via the internet

Do you believe him?

Lil Wayne - Prom Queen

Prom Queen

So the video for Lil' Wayne's 'Prom Queen' premiered recently and I found it a lot easier to watch when I left the sound off. This song is one of Weezy's latest "eclectic" efforts and I really can't do it with him this round. But I also know that there are lots of things I can't fucking stand that get inexplicable love from the masses and this I presume shall be no different.

Thoughts
- O Hai Thar! Is that Ms. Katrina LaVerne?
- The moshpit scene is the most staged and confused moshpit scene I have ever observed. Hannah Montana and them can go harder than that!
- I never see this many black women in rock videos. I'll tentatively drop that in the positive box for safe keeping.
- Ron Howard passed on the cameo because the set was not trill enough for his liking.

2009 Oscars

I'm sure you know the drill. Tonight is the Academy's 51st Motion Picture Awards Ceremony and I will be liveblogging it. Check back during the show and/or follow me on twitter.

8:29 - Sippity sip sip.
8:30 - SHOW STARTS. A brilliant crystal set design. It's got old world glam and I love that stuff
8:31 - Hugh Jackman takes the stage.
8:32 - He takes a dig at New Zealand. Ouch, can't you guys get along?
8:33 - Now he's performing a music number...I'm gonna throw my remote somewhere with my eyes closed so that I don't change the channel.
8:34 - He busted an ill move with the "Craigslist?" dancers
8:35 - Performing Frost/Nixon with Anne Hathaway
8:36 - Now he's a performing a hot ass mess with some people in silver suits
8:40 - Hugh's gonna be a decent host. he's quite the showman
8:43 - Tilda Swinton looks alien and sexy.
8:44 - Whoopi's dress says 'So you want me to wear a dress huh? I'll show you a dress alright, i'm gonna wear some bullshit, and ima wear it to the Oscars."
8:47 - The Best Supporting Actress goes to Penelope Cruz. She looks kinda platinum quincenera but she actually looks great
8:52 - Tina Fey and Steve Martin take the stage in a comedy bit. "to write is to live forever, the man who wrote that is dead." Then they take a dig at Scientology.
8:57 - Dustin Lance Black wins the Best Screenplay award for 'Milk' gives a pretty equal rights speech.
8:59 - Best Adapted Screenplay goes to Simon Beufoy for Slumdog Millionaire. I didn't love this movie but I didn't see the other ones so maybe it deserved it. Good for him/them/everyone/whatever
9:02 - Jack Black and Jen Aniston present the nominees for Best Animated Feature. Jack Black's muggung is amusing/tolerable but the montage makes zero sense. Camera cuts away to Angelina who giggles knowingly.
9:06 - Wall-E wins it.
9:08 - The Best Animated Short award goes to a polite asian man who says Sank You like a dozen times and then ends w Domo Arigato and scurries of stage. I laugh because I am culturally deficient in many ways.
9:15 - Daniel Graig's sexy ass saunters onstage with Sarah Jessica Parker whose dress I hate. They present nominees for Best Art Direction.
9:17 - Goes to Benjamin Button..yawning
9:31 - Okay Natalie Portman takes the stage and Ben Stiller comes out doin a disheveled insane Joaquin Phoenix impression complete w beard and sunglasses. Natalie kills him and says "you look like you work at a Hassidic meth lab"
9:35 - Slumdog takes it for best cinematography
9:39 - Jessica Biel comes out lookin like she rolled out of bed,wrapped the silksheets around her toga style and pulled her hair back. She presents some technical award and proceeds to bore the sht outta me with a category that would be interesting had it been presented on the Discovery Channel
9:41 - A commercial airs for what looks like a hilarious tragedy starring Jamie Foxx as an insane musician
9:42 - Seth Rogen and James Franco reprise their Pineapple Express roles and remind me how I should be watching this award show. High as shit! This interlude is pretty funny, Franco kinda confuses Robert Downey Jr. for Barack Obama
9:47 - Oscar goes to some folks with thoroughly unpronounceable names, Seth and Franco Present the award and giggle at the names like school children. I love it.
9:52 - Hugh comes back go do another fancy dandy musical number. Then he's joined by Beyonce in a red sequin Shug Avery getup. They perform some musical numbers while my blood pressure rises.
9:56 - The HighSchool Musical kids join them and I will never forgive the Academy.
10:04 - Cuba is trying to bu funny... embarassing himself though.
10:06 - Ledger gets the Oscar for the Joker. Amazing performance. He totally deserved it, His performance was amazing
10:09 - His family accepts the award for him and gives a polite and moving speech honoring his memory. It's nice.
10:13 - Documentary montage pops on screen, this dude with the most unruly set of teeth i've seen in some time says something. I lol.
10:14 - Bill Mahr plugs Religulous and the award goes to Man on a Wire, this little frenchman is adorable, and then he balances the Oscar on his face! *clapping*
10:25 - Will Smith comes onstage to present for Outstanding Visual Effects...tries to be funny...fading
10:26 - All the action movies get shtted on and it goes to Benjamin Button...yay
10:30 - Nominees for soundmixing are...Oscar goes to Slumdog...
10:35 - Nominees for editing are...Oscar goes to Slumdog...headache again, tired..will smith acknowledges he is inexplicably still on stage tryna make this borin sht sound interesting
10:40 - I QUIT THIS BITCH. Gonna lay down I can't make it through. Sorry people but if you are watching this then you have my sympathy.