The Obama Booty Call

The President-Elect is Barack Obama and as you may have already assumed I'm pleased. I won't bother to do a 'How does it feel?' blog because quite frankly if you've been watching any news channel you've seen the 'crying-black-people-from-all-around-the-world' reel ad nauseum and you already know how I felt.
So, I'd like to take a moment to discuss other matters this afternoon.

Is anyone else familiar with the phenomenon of the Obama Booty Call? or Obooty Call?
Oh, you know what I'm talking about. Someone trying to get at you using the pretense of inspiration and political minded discourse. Maybe, its just my isolated experience but in light of recent events I have been inundated with texts, instant messages, and phone calls from folks I haven't spoke to in years. Most of them are sharing in the excitement. Some of whom are trying to parlay the overwhelming emotions of this era of change and hope into inspiring previously conservative or reluctant ass into bold, bipartisan directions.
Trickin with Hope.

It can come in a variety of forms but it typically begins with Person X* contacting you out of the blue and using the election as an excuse for the interruption. For me, it began election day, getting texts from randoms I had long forgotten about or possibly never knew.
For the purpose of exposition here are some examples of several types of Obooty calls that may or may not be copy and pasted or retyped verbatim. *smh*

.:The Text:.

_: "The Streets Keep Callin'.... I Gotta Change My Number":_

Person X: Ayoo, shawty. Wuts good?

me: ?

Person X: Me, i just voted. U vote?

me: Hell yeah i voted. Yo, who is this?

Person X: Daaaaag ma. its like that? dis ******, yo what u doin this weekend?

me: Ohh...prolly something else

Person X: Huh? but yo get at me. we should do somethin, ta celebrate.
*****The Block Obama '08*****
Git that guap. G unit, D-Block, Birdgang, Dipset, Ay!
text sent via Sidekick.

I discovered there are also exotic variations on this type of text.

_:Political Sex Text:_

Person X: We did it. Obama is the man.

me: Yeah I know, i'm so excited. i can't even believe it

Person X: I know you're excited, I can tell. I can believe it.

me: it was crazy though. I thought it would be closer.

Person X: yeah you can't always tell.. I mean the campaign was so long and so hard...

me: yea

Person X: yeah it was real intense.

me: mmhmm

Person X: But he just kept pushing forward. building so much momentum. he wasn't gonna stop. shit, he prolly couldn't stop even if he wanted to.
they thought they had him when they brought in that white girl

me: Palin?

Person X: yeah. but they should have known a brother could handle that chick. i mean hes too cool to let some jawn like that phase him.

me: Thas true

Person X: Hes very orally skilled. we have alot in common.

me: ...yea

Person X: But toward the end tension kept rising and the polls were tightening. I almost couldn't take it. But i knew my man would come on top. How did it feel for you when it happened?

me: wow, i mean i was just overwhelmed, i was crying a lil bit

Person X: Mmm, I bet I'll have you crying

me: what?

Person X: What you doin tonite?

.:The Instant Message:.
There were quite a bit more of these than texts but I'll just post a few examples...

This is from a random whom I had the good fortune of eventually losing contact with.... Only for Obama to return him to my IM window. He hit me up about an hour before the announcement pretending to be inspired and inquiring about my life. Then 11 pm rolled around....

Tuesday, Nov. 4, 2008

NOTE THE TIME!!!

This next one, I'm ashamed to say, is from an ex-boy, who after hitting me up with some of the above mentioned Obooty call dialogue was apparently inspired by Obama to redistribute my wealth.

*SMH* 2008

This last one isn't technically a booty call but it's a little election night correspondence that left me feeling satisfied. The character in question is the individual from a previous post who was attempting to convince me that Obama is the antichrist. I mean even if he is, so what?

Luxuriate in the deliciousness, bitch.

The commonality to all of these Obooty calls is that they leave me wanting the real thing. Who wouldn't turn Lewinsky for the 44th President (Sorry, Michelle)? Intelligent, terrible dancer, tragic mullato corniness/sexiness. I'd respond to a late night smiley from him anyday.
I need ;-P I can believe in.

So, you bookworm negroes better step your collective game up and parlay the former Senator from Chicago's success with the ladies into a revolution instead of lazily tacking parts of his speeches on to your pick up lines. Maybe now instead of these young boys pretending to be hood they'll pretend to be college educated to get some trim.
FELLAS, START BRINGING YOUR DEGREE TO THE CLUB. Cause, I want to see it. I want to see it real bad.


*I'll give him the moniker person X because this person usually is an Ex of some sort. Ex-boyfriend, Ex-friend, Ex-jumpoff, Ex-used to buy me sht cause he thought he was gettin the drawls, etc,. I assume Person X is male but I'm sure theres some enterprising females getting they Obama Booty Call on.

**names were changed to protect the ignorant and the irrelevant.

If I were a Boy

So there's a rumor that one of the dancers in Beyonce's Single Ladies (Put a Ring on It) video is some sort of dude. Oh, you know, the darker one. Even if there wasn't a rumor before I'm gonna go with it.


Beyonce - Single Ladies (Put a Ring On It)

I actually really like this song despite my tense relationship with Mrs. Knowles-Carter. I will say that for what she is and what she does she's very good at it. But I get annoyed when speculation that she is deep or really really creative begins to surface. I'll save the hate for another day however and get back to this business of the male dancer.
Upon reviewing the video a few times in several picture qualities I would have to say the jury is still kind of out but I'm leaning toward 'Oh my God! That's a dude!'
And you know what? More power to him. He's dancing on point, and looks fabulous. it's not beyond the realm of possibility. Sasha Fierce is a diva and as such gets and shows love from the fairy section. I could totally see her being on board with 'homegirl' in her video. And, why not?
Some would say, "Well come on now. How could a man have the phattest ass in a Beyonce video?"
To that I say "Y'all might wanna look a little bit closer at what you're trying to bring home from the club."

I'll leave y'all with some words of wisdom from the great Luenelle:




Go sit in a corner and think on it.

Watch More South Park

South Park Fun

Barack Obama

Michelle Obama

John McCain

Sarah Palin

I couldn't resist making one for that Ashley Todd girl. If this is the thing that sends me to hell, so be it. I'll take one for the team.

America's Best Dance Crew '08

http://view.break.com/592648 - Watch more free videos

Obama and McCain - Battle Dance

Yeah, I think I've reached my exhaustion point on politics for this year. We're all boned either way. This video however is the stuff of fantasies and nightmares.

I'm going to have to announce McCain as the winner of this battle. Just because he brought in Sarah Palin who held down her G status and was poppin that ass like a bad chick. Not to mention Barack Obama WISH he could dance like that. I saw him callin himself tryna shake somethin on Ellen a while back. He could have benefited from a few more barbecues with Michelle's peoples.

Obama - 4 McCain - 1

Why Not

I've been taking in bits of new music here and there to ease my economic woes. I've discovered some new loves (Ms. Jazmine Sullivan) as well as hearing bits and pieces leaked and released from some old favorites.

Marshall- Most of you have probably heard the freestyle 'Relapse'. I suppose it's silly to even pass judgment on something like that, or even Eminem for that matter. I mean he's talking Jamaican again. Vibe magazine has recently announced him the greatest rapper of all time according to an online poll and more fights have broken out over this decree than they do over a spades tables (I had the misfortune of witnessing both disputes occur simultaneously). I think the 'best' title is always going to be impossible to determine particularly in a genre as diverse as hip hop. You can generate a 'top' list but there will always be confounding variables. Are we talking lyricism? Are we talking influence? Are we talking popularity? Hit making ability? Slim Shady has all of these things but he, like most rappers, owes credit to some of them to elements outside of his control. The verdict will forever be out on who the greatest is but if Vibe wants to say its Slim for now I suppose I won't argue too much.

50 Cent - Get Up. Dope meaningless shit from ya boy Curtis. (image unnecessary)

Mr. West- I hear Love Lockdown, I hear Heartless, and most recently I hear Coldest Winter. Well, hmm. His singing has improved between the first and the third. I actually like Coldest Winter a little better than I like Heartless. Not because I prefer singing Kanye to rapping Kanye but I just feel like Ye should be able to make a better rap song than Heartless if he's like, supposed to be a rapper. But, if you want to add an interesting twist to it, he's really supposed to be a producer. But let's not go there.
Coldest Winter has the same strengths and weaknesses as Love Lockdown in my opinion. It sounds more like what it feels like, but his lyrics ring of high school poetry. I suppose he's trying to say something. And I think we all have the right to judge it but I'm reaching the conclusion that this album isn't even for us anyway.
Lack of knowledge or information didn't prevent me from speculating before so why stop now? -On a human level, maybe he just needs to wail and get these things out of his system so that he can progress to something less miserable.
-On another level... I was watching the tube and some pop culture analyst popped up to say that slow meaningful somber songs become hits when the economy is bad whereas upbeat up tempo songs usually don't chart as well when people have no money. Maybe, Mr. West is a marketing genius. In any case, he's bound to have us all depressed and even more broke by the time he gets through with us.

Def Comedy Jam

McCain Roasts Obama
..ignore the propaganda at the end. McCain was funny but all that wasn't necessary.




Obama Roasts McCain


...neither of them wrote any of this shit but it was definitely funny. Funny thing is my verdict on their routines is identical to my opinion of the last debate. McCain made some good points, started off better than I expected but Obama performed a bit better even though he started off weaker, and he spoke more smoothly, and basically delivered.

Obama - 4 , McCain - 0